COMFORT ME OFTEN is the second performance I have developed using the ‘Live Dreaming’ methodology, which uses my body as a mirror to reflect parallels of performative and dream states. It was premiered at the FIX 21 Biennale in Belfast, and Performed at The Oram Awards 2021 in Partnership with Supersonic Festival, supported by The PRS Foundation.

It fuses together a layered score of remembered movements, tics, snippets from my dream journal, and fragments of my mum’s writing.

My mum died when I was twelve. At the beginning of lockdown, I decided to look at her diary when she was the same age. She wrote longingly about seeing a Shakespeare play in England and living thousands of miles away from her family who lived in India.



After any performance or thing that has moved me, a feel as if I must live this thing and the only vent for this is dreams



I was deeply affected by this tiny snapshot of her life at age twelve-. It spoke to me about the power of the mind and dreams to escape loneliness.

The piece is performed using two Max Msp Patches.

One patch is connected to two muscle sensors on my shoulders, which trigger samples when they detect muscle flexes.

The intensity and sustain of my muscle flexes modulates the pitch and speed of samples.

The second max patch is connected to my vocal.

It selects portions of vocals and granulates them, playing them back at varying speeds, it favours shorter vocal phrases over time selecting words instead of sung notes.

The original concept and technology were developed with support from Arts Council England, with Technical Direction from Robin Foster.



SCORE

I feel as if I must live this thing and the only vent for this is dreams.

Eddy was Romeo.

She looked awfully handsome and just the part.

Dreams (my dreams) are very real to me, and comfort me often.

I cannot tell what mine is to take and what is not

A tiny walnut tree I planted.

Bundles of lotus root and lavender

Leap to the moment as it burns

Sweet muskiness

Cry happy beyond a burning year

A glittering career.

The roof begins to leak